Love Lessons

Written by Don Puno
Dedicated to 2 Beautiful Friends and to anyone who needs some words of encouragement..

from the blog of http://chyns.multiply.com/journal/item/33


"When an emotional injury takes place,
The body begins a process
As natural as the healing
Of a physical wound

Let the process happen.
Trust that nature
Will do the healing.

Know that the pain will pass,
And, when it passes
You will be stronger;
Happier, more sensitive and aware."

There was this girl who always dreamed of having someone...someone to hold...someone to lean on...someone to love... and someone to share the rest of her days with. Then suddenly out of nowhere, someone came along...someone that made her life worth living for...someone that made her feel complete...they were lost in their own world...staring deeply into each others eyes...sharing laughter and tears...but it didn't end there. They had so many memories to look back on...through letters, to pictures, to trials and tribulations...nothing could tear them apart...till fate stepped in. There was the girl, lying on the ground crying in a river of tears..."How could this happen? How could her only love deceive her, was the love she gave him not enough? What did she do wrong? Then she stopped crying, wiped the last tear on her cheek and asked help from above...and soon she began to realize that after awhile a person will learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul, then she will learn that love doesn't mean leaning and company doesn't mean security, and then she learns that kisses aren't contracts and presents aren't promises, and finally she would begin to accept her defeats with her head up and her eyes open, with the grace of an adult, not the grief of a child, then she would learn that even sunshine burns if you get too much... so the girl finally decided to plant her own garden and decorate her own soul, instead of waiting for someone to bring her flowers, she then told herself, I can endure, I am strong. I have worth.

Well you see life is trial and error, we win some we lose some, but through it all we learn to accept, to forgive, and to have the courage to say... life goes on.

MARRIAGE

from the account of MS. Fina Zen Maye Wamar:

http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=294488296326&id=705432689&ref=mf

Every word of it brings one drop of tear on my eyes...! Sey

When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce.. I raised the topic calmly.

She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Dew. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.

She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Dew so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Dew.

When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce.
She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.

She requested that everyday for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning.. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Dew about my wife's divorce conditions.. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully..

My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time.. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.

On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Dew about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mum out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy.

I drove to office.... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind...I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead.. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other any more. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.

Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.

At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead.

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

If you don't share this, nothing will happen to you.

If you do, you just might save a marriage.


Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

Oh pictures....!

Oh, pictures!!! You're smiling but then behind those smiles are dull moments, sad memories and bad experiences.

No one is exempted from pain even the richest, most beautiful and most powerful person in the world only sometimes we have to hide it.

But admit it, there will always be times that you can't help but nurture the pain. It's not wrong to cry sometimes. I'm just human and I won't deny that I'm hurting. They might get angry cause sometimes I cry. It's not that easy especially if you're the one who was being hurt. You'll think of some reasons why things had happened that way and what's wrong with you. You'll suffer lost of self confidence, low self esteem and even panic stage. I can't deny it, I won't and I wouldn't. They don't know what I've been through so it would be easy for them to say, " stop crying", " don't think about it anymore" etc.....

I thought we're just mere victims of the situation however, in life there are choices. They choose to do it though they knew it was wrong not considering the people around them. Don't be selfish folks. Let's try to put ourselves in other people's shoes. Then you will know the difference and learn that what goes around comes around. (rosellesantosdavid)

Conversation 012510

I am sitting between MRA and MHB. Panu kaya pag sabay nila akong kinausap. Minsan nagpalit sila ng upuan, pero gitna pa din ako! Kahit saang sulok ng office ako dalhin palagi kong kasama si MRA. hehehe!

(1) Una napagusapan ang gutom

MHB: David (English) kain tayo sa labas ah, nagugutom na ako pero kumain naman ako sa

bahay eh.

MRD: Sige labas tayo. (earlier nabanggit ko may Skyflakes pala ako).

MHB: David yung skyflakes, gutom na ako, byaran ko na lang....

MRD: Hay sorry yun pala yun.... (sabay kuha ng skyflakes pati pat Uraro cookies)

MHB: David mas gusto ko pala yan, nagbago na isip ko....

(2) napunta sa pagtawag sa UPS. May package ulit ng dummay samples galing Hong Kong.

MRD: Honey, tawagan mo nga pala yung UPS.

MHB: Tinawagan ko na kaso hindi ko makontact eh

MRD: Gamitin mo kaya Skype ni Ms. Trace?

MHB: Tinry ko na din wala eh. Kabisado ko na nga yung number nila kahit mahaba eh.

(3) Pagkatapos pag-harap ko sa Kaliwa si MRA n2man makakausap ko

MRA: David, ano ulam mo kanina?

MRD: Wala, nagising lang ako nung nagpunta si Val sa bahay eh.

MRA: Wala, wala ka.

MRD: Sorry. Nakuha mo ba Birth Certificate mo?

MRA: Hindi, ang haba ng pila, pagkatapos ko magbayad, nagpunta agad ako ng 7/11 bumili

ako ng malaking slurpee. Tapos 3 pa ang release. Aba, 3:30 na hindi pa tinatawag.

AFTER LUNCH:

(4) tapos bigla namin naalala yung pangako ni SK pagbalik galing Chowking

MRD: SK hindi namin nakakalimutan Monday ngayon..

MHB: ou nga SK

MLS: ako din, kaso umalis ako eh.

MRD: woooh, excuses mo talaga.

MLS: oo na wag nio ko kulitin.

MRD: ang sungit mo naman. Yaan mo na HOney, promises are meant to be broken talaga

lalo na pag galing sa tooooooo.

MHB: bawal mag toooot diba?

MRD: Hay, ou nga pala!

(5) maya-maya nauwi sa Logo

MHB: Mads pa-forward ng logo ng Facts and Figures

MMA: wait photoshop ko lang ah (si Mads yan ah, hndi si Maggie)

(6) tapos bigla ako nanaman ang kinausap ni MHB

MHB: David bati na tayo ah,

MRD: OU nga nga

MHB: Sus ang art mo, kaartihan!

MHB: nag-upload na ba ng file ang AIMED?

MRD: Hindi pa.

MHB: David, I AGREE...

MHBB: David, Ike-credit check pa ba natin yung kay Josh

MRD: Yup go on with the credit cheking para kapag ready na sila wala na tayong problema

MHB: David naman, SONY MUSIC ENTERTAINMENT;

nagulat ako, W*F ang laki ng client ni Joshy. May pictures pa nila Beyonce, Alicia Keys and Britney Spears. Dinaga tuloy ang Berry, imagine SONY PMG....uber sa okei...

tapos lumapit si Paul

MJV: Selle, pede bang hatiin sa 2 and bayad sa Credit Card?

MRD: yup! Bibigyan ng 2 secured payment link. May limit ba ang card?

tapos nabalik sa usapn sa Credit check ng SONY MUSIC ENTERTAINMENT

MHB: David, hati tayo, sige na! sinend ko na sayo

MRD: (Sabay tingin sa Inbox.) Hala meron nga.......

MHB: (patawa-tawa pa) sige na David

MRD: (Chineck ang naka-attach na pdf file)

MHB: napaparanoid ako jan David.

MRD: Yes, I promise to do my best, to love God and my country. To help other people

everyday especially those at home....THE GIRL SCOUT PROMISE...

MHB: Sino founder ng Girl Scout?

MRD: Si Josefa Llanes Escoda

MHB: eh yung gumawa ng Philippine flag

MRD: wait isipin ko wag mo sabihin.....(si MHB di nakatiis)

MHB: Si Teodora Agoncillo

MLS: Tama

MRD: Hindi ah, Si Marcela Agoncillo

MLS: ou nga writer si Marcela Agoncillo (kanino kaya talga kampi si SK?)

MHB: Wait (sabay research...at pagkatpos )..sabi ko nga writer yun eh

MRD: hahahaha! tama ako

biglang wala na kasi busy na yung line......! toooot....toooot.....toooot.....walang maingay may sesendan ako ng quotations!

Ang aking Akala

I thought the pain is over....hmmm hindi pa pala. Pero hindi naman ganun kadali yun eh. Akala ko kapag lumipat ng bahay mas makakagaan pero ganun din, ganun parin. Minsan pa may mga taong kang gustong makita pero mahirap at hindi pwede kasi may mga bagay na dapat itago, ilihim at di pwedeng sabihin. Bakit kaya ganun. Napakahirap...! Sobra....!

Weekends nanaman. Makatulog kaya ako sa bahay? Sana naman kasi 1 week na kong di makatulog ng maayos, minsan pati pagkain balewala na rin pero kailangan mo kumain kasi kapag nagkasakit ka hindi lang ikaw ang apektado.

Iniisip ko na lang hindi lang naman ako ang may problema sa mundo. Marami pang iba at dadaanin na lang sa tawa, pero hindi yun pwedeng gawin sa lahat ng oras...duamrating talaga ang lonely mode...parang emo mode...hahahahaha!

Naalala ko tuloy yung isang friend ko. Nung nabuntis siya ng BF niya, litong lito siya, hindi alam ang gagawin. Mahirap pa dun ayaw panagutan ng BF niya ang bata....iniisip ko pano niya nakaya yun? Ang galing niya....sana natuto na siya ngayon sa kanyang mga pagkakamali.

Loaded na ang utak ko. Ang daming laman. Iba-ibang topic na ang pumapasok sa utak ko or rahter iniisip ko para malibang lang. Mamaya pag-uwi titignan ko nanaman si Marianne. May bago siyang damit ngayon eh. Dress na black. Buti na lang bumalik siya. Kahit papano may natatanaw ako. Buti pa nga siya parang payapa ang utak, palaging nakangiti.

Napakahirap, basta mahirap, sobrang hirap.....!